Embrace Your Age and Abilities To Empower Yourself

"Aging is not lost youth but a new stage of opportunity and strength." ~Betty Freidan

Today I am feeling my age. It doesn't happen often. I usually feel younger than my chronological age. But today, my legs are uncooperative, and every part of my body aches.

Today I feel 53. The past few days have been rainy; I am sure my body knows it. Downing Advil and Tylenol aren't alleviating my symptoms.

My new MS specialist advised he does not believe in the condition known as Fibromyalgia, something I was diagnosed with in addition to MS. So, is it Fibro, MS, or simply being 53?

"You can't help getting older, but you don't have to get old." ~George Burns

After reading Jon Kabat-Zinn's book, Mindfulness for Beginners, I inwardly recited his mantra," Until you stop breathing, there's more right with you than wrong with you." More right with you than wrong with you. I like that – simple and accurate.

"Do not regret growing old. It is a privilege denied to many." ~Anonymous

When we begin to dwell on our ailments – the ones we inevitably feel as we pass the half-century mark - we wonder if this ache or that twitch is the one that will begin our downward spiral. One reader on About.com/Senior Living said about aging: "I wonder what we would "feel" like if we didn't know how old we are. I think societal norms and expectations regarding age heavily influence us. So I try not to think about the actual number of my age."

Now that I'm past 50, I've finally realized I am in charge of my destiny. I now embrace my age by loving my actions and who I am. Life after child rearing, menopause, and (almost) college tuition can be an exciting and rewarding time.

Life after 50 comes down to this: dwell on what is wrong or treasure what is right. I can't walk long distances, so I bike instead. I can't do aerobics, so I take gentle yoga classes. It's all about embracing who you are, using your many abilities, and maintaining a positive attitude.

"When grace is joined with wrinkles, it is adorable. There is an unspeakable dawn in happy old age." ~Victor Hugo

I've always been a glass-half-full kind of girl. That philosophy has served me well. It can do the same for you.

I recently read an article by Barbara Hannah Grufferman, author and columnist for AARP, entitled "5 Infuriating Fibs About Women Over 50." (Do yourself a favor and read it!) As I read the article, I found myself nodding in agreement. The line that truly gave me an "Aha!" moment was, "Don't fight your age. Embrace it. Whatever it is." Sage advice.

If you liked this post, please share it with others! Click the REPLY button to leave a COMMENT. SUBSCRIBE by clicking on the SUBSCRIBE button. Check out past posts under "Recent Posts to Keep You Empowered." DISCLAIMER: Comments from An Empowered Spirit are brought to your attention on topics that could benefit you and should be discussed with your doctor or other medical professional. I am not medically trained, and my posts are journalistic and not instead of medical advice. An Empowered Spirit and its author will not be held liable for any damages incurred from using this blog or any data or links provided.

Jean Chatzky And How She Empowered Me

Jean Chatzky and me food shopping

"I love money. I love everything about it. I bought some pretty good stuff. I got myself a $300 pair of socks. I got a fur sink. An electric dog polisher. A gasoline-powered turtleneck sweater. And, of course, I bought some dumb stuff, too." ~Steve Martin

My husband and I were busy preparing dinner a few weeks ago. I had my laptop on the kitchen counter with Facebook open to the financial journalist and author Jean Chatzky's page. She posed the following question to her readers:

" Hi, everyone! I'm working on an episode for my new show and want to know whether someone in your life is an excellent shopper. Tell me who it is and what makes them the best shopper you know -- I would love to profile them for the show. Looking forward to hearing from you!"

Without thinking, I immediately replied:

"My husband is by far the BEST shopper I know. If I hear him come home and not hear plastic bags rustling, something is wrong. He is incredible, from buying a car, shoes, groceries, and pharmaceuticals. Coupons, Google Search, Consumer Reports, and read, read, read about all sorts of consumer products. I've learned a lot from him over the years (happily)! OH, I forgot - he also loves to food shop - how great for me, eh?"

Several days later, I got a call from Jean's producer saying that Jean was interested in my response. She was intrigued by my nomination of my husband. Separate phone interviews were scheduled for Gary and me. Unknowingly, we both mentioned our fondness for Trader Joe's and how they never sacrifice good quality by offering lower prices. We also mentioned Gary's trick for purchasing a car. My husband emails several car dealers, tells them the price we are willing to pay (after looking up the Blue Book value), and waits for them to fall over themselves to give us their best price.

Jean's producer thought our stories were cute and funny, and enjoyable. After 24 years of marriage, we'll take those compliments - with pleasure.

A few days later, we were told that Jean wanted us on her show and wanted to tape it at our home.

"If it weren't for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of television, we'd still be eating frozen radio dinners." ~Johnny Carson

Let me explain something. On the one hand, we have Gary, who majored in Journalism. He's been on national television as a sports-law commentator, is an excellent trial attorney, and has emceed several fundraisers in front of hundreds of people. I, on the other hand, have a fear of public speaking.

After college, I worked as a copywriter for McGraw-Hill Book Company. Writing has always been my passion, and, fortunately, it's a passion that doesn't require appearing in front of large audiences. (See my post about self-acceptance).

I felt nervous and apprehensive. I wondered whether I could lose 10 pounds before taping. What was I doing? Why didn't I think this through before responding on Facebook? Then it suddenly dawned on me. I'm 53 years old. This is my Second Chapter. How many chances will I have to appear with Jean, someone I respect and admire, on national television? Here I am espousing the virtues of living a vibrant and happy life after age 50, telling people to face their fears, conquer self-acceptance and live a quality life. If I'm going to talk the talk, I also need to walk the walk.

"All right, Mr. DeMille, I'm ready for my close-up." ~Norma Desmond in the movie Sunset Boulevard

Jean's crew and her producer arrived at our door with cameras and lights and smiled in tow. Their youthful exuberance rubbed off on us, and we became excited to begin taping the show. They rearranged our furniture, set up our microphones, and waited for Jean to arrive. When she did, she was as lovely as they were. We talked and laughed and were ready to begin. It was smooth sailing with Jean at the helm.

When our interview ended, we caravanned to a local grocery store, Corrado's Family Affair. (Trader Joe's doesn't allow filming interviews at their stores.) They filmed Gary shopping for fresh fish, fruit, and vegetables while Jean asked him a few more questions. It looked very natural and authentic.

I was proud of my husband being filmed, doing a task that used to be considered a "wifely" chore. Jean explained she'd read a study where 30% of husbands now do the grocery shopping for their family. I want to offer you what I learned from this experience:

Money matters can be fascinating. I wish elementary school curriculums included teaching students about money. Children should be taught early on how to be smart about saving and investing their money, preparing them for the risks and challenges of holding onto their money by reaching adulthood.
A good pair of jeans and a nice sweater is all a woman needs to make a good appearance. From Coco Chanel to Mary Quant to Vera Wang, women's fashions have significantly changed over the years. We can now dress as comfortably as we choose while looking and feeling great. My issue has always been that I worry too much about what to wear for any given occasion. When I recently went clothes shopping, a sales clerk at Chico's told me (for this interview) to dress, wear my best pair of jeans, a casual sweater, and simple accessories. In other words, be myself. (I have to put a plug-in for a woman I "met "on Facebook. Marla Ginsburg has a new line of beautiful clothing I think is perfect for 50+ somethings. It's the Marla Wynne Collection and can be found on HSN).
Be confident in who you are. Everyone comes from different backgrounds, experiences, and ideologies. We all have unique gifts we are given when we are born. Be confident with those gifts; they are a commodity unique to you. Jean uses her special gifts as a journalist, author, and motivational speaker. I use my gift using the written word to inspire, educate, support, and enlighten. What is your unique gift?
Be your authentic self. This is different than #3. This is being who you are, not someone you think you should be. Because in the end, it never matters what you wear, how much you weigh, or how big your house is. What matters is the person you are in your heart and soul. The real you will always shine through. You are essential, and you matter.

Do you want to know Jean's advice on being a savvy shopper? Then you'll have to tune into RLTV when Jean's show, Cash Call, airs the episode "Deals"…with The Chesters! As soon as I find out when it's airing, I'll let you know.

Click on the REPLY button to leave a COMMENT. SUBSCRIBE to my blog by clicking the SUBSCRIBE button (located on the top right-hand side of the page.) Check out past posts under "Recent Posts to Keep You Empowered." Feel free to share my blog and pass it around. Enjoy! DISCLAIMER: Comments from An Empowered Spirit are brought to your attention on topics that could benefit you and should be discussed with your doctor or other medical professional. I am not medically trained, and my posts are journalistic and not instead of medical advice. An Empowered Spirit and its author will not be held liable for any damages incurred from the use of this blog or any data or links provided

Hurricane Sandy: A List of Ways to Help Yourself and Others (Empower Yourself!)

“We shall draw from the heart of suffering itself the means of inspiration and survival.” ~Winston Churchill

As I write this post, I feel blessed to have escaped the wrath of Hurricane Sandy. So much damage interrupted so many lives in such a short amount of time. We were blessed because we only lost power and cell service.

We were cold, tired, and worried. We were as prepared as possible, with duct tape neatly taped across our windows and outdoor furniture carried into our garage. We braced for the worst, kept our conversation flowing for hours, and waited. We waited and waited and waited.

Our tiny battery-operated radio kept us as informed as possible on the path and devastation of the storm. We were grateful for the radio and talked about how our parents and grandparents must have sat around a radio just like we were while hanging onto every word the announcer said during a crisis.

When the winds finally died down and morning eventually came, we realized the threat of the hurricane was over. We were all fine, and our home remained intact.

Two days later, when our power was restored, we were grateful.

Unfortunately, not everyone was as blessed as we were. Many people in our town continue to have no electricity. Yet they also are fine with little to no damage to themselves or their homes.

Last night when I returned home, I turned on the television and, for the first time, saw the frightening images of the devastation around New Jersey and New York. Homes and lives were lost. People were stranded.

In the City of Hoboken, The National Guard was on the scene rescuing residents from flooded apartments. Seaside Height’s famous Ferris Wheel (that stood for 99 years) was destroyed, seemingly sinking into the ocean.

The subway system and tunnels around Manhattan were flooded, leaving the city virtually at a standstill. Entire towns were lying underwater, and residents had to run, climb and swim to safety.

There was a massive gasoline shortage; I passed one Lukoil station where at least one hundred cars were waiting to receive a rationed amount of gas.

Another angry act of Mother Nature, a year after Hurricane Irene, has come and gone, leaving behind its ugly path of destruction once again.

Its presence has reawakened in us the knowledge that weather fronts are quickly changing, and we need to become more aware of how to prepare ourselves better for this change.

We also need to realize that, more than ever, life is as fleeting as the storms that come and go. This has been another wake-up call to live each day to the fullest.

Let’s all take good care of our loved ones and ourselves. Be kind and generous to those around you whenever you can. Reach out to those in need and try to help those who cannot help themselves.

As someone with Multiple Sclerosis, I know what it’s like to live with a disability. Like the hurricane that crossed our path, MS can come unexpectedly, at rapid speed, and leave its devastation behind in our bodies at any moment. Its wrath affects us in myriad ways and knows no bounds.

As someone over 50, it is even more critical always to be prepared, as best as I can, to deal with the ravages MS can bring and the inevitable stress our bodies endure when preparing for another natural disaster.

I’ve learned that knowledge IS power. Reliable information is crucial. EMPOWERing ourselves is paramount. .

Recently I learned about a beautiful website that offers quality information about MS. I’d like to share it with you. It is Healthline (Connect to Better Health) and offers ways to learn about the basics of MS, finding medical treatments from traditional to alternative, and provides tools to track and manage your MS. They have an active Facebook page to help you stay connected and up-to-date with a large community of other Facebook fans. Check it out!

I hope all of you affected by Hurricane Sandy are safe and warm. I will continue to keep you all in my prayers.

ORGANIZATIONS TO PROVIDE RELIEF TO THOSE AFFECTED BY SANDY:

•The Red Cross - All donations will provide shelter, food, emotional support, and other assistance to those affected by the storm. •The New York Blood Center is urging people to donate blood for those in the New York/New Jersey area. To donate, call 800-933-2566 or visit The NY Blood Center.

•The Salvation Army - The Salvation Army has dozens of mobile feeding units and shelters along the East Coast, working to serve thousands in the most heavily hit areas.

•Feeding America has thousands of pounds of emergency food, water, and supplies in the disaster zone that it is working to distribute to the storm's victims.

•AmeriCares provides medicine and other supplies to people affected by Hurricane Sandy.

•World Vision is distributing flood clean-up kits, personal hygiene items, and emergency food kits to people hit by the hurricane.

•Save the Children is also working to provide relief to families and their children.

•Samaritan’s Purse is asking for volunteers to help storm victims.

•The United Way Hurricane Sandy Recovery Fund was established to address the near-term and long-term recovery needs of individuals, families, and communities along the Eastern Seaboard impacted by Hurricane Sandy’s devastation.

•UJA Federation of New York is set up to receive donations and “mobilize the resources of our community to offer assistance — and rebuild for the future.”

(Thank you to ABC News Online for their list of resources.)

Click on the REPLY button to leave a COMMENT. SUBSCRIBE to my blog by clicking the SUBSCRIBE button (located on the top right-hand side of the page.) Check out past posts under “Recent Posts to Keep You Empowered.” Feel free to share my blog and pass it around. Enjoy! DISCLAIMER: Comments from An Empowered Spirit are brought to your attention on topics that could benefit you and should be discussed with your doctor or other medical professional. I am not medically trained, and my posts are journalistic and not instead of medical advice. An Empowered Spirit and its author will not be held liable for any damages incurred from using this blog or any data or links provided.

Our Next Big Decision And How To Empower Ourselves

“The great thing in the world is not so much where we stand, as in what direction we are moving.” ~Oliver Wendall Holmes

It’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood. The sun is shining, and the leaves are autumnal tones of orange, yellow, and red. The air feels crisp and clean, and promising. It’s invigorating to step outside and see the palette of colors we are blessed to enjoy.

But when Halloween is over, the pumpkins are thrown away, and the trees are bare. I unconsciously begin to grind my teeth in anticipation of winter. Winter, to me, is simply a season of coats, gloves, and long johns. It’s shoveling snow, driving on ice, and tolerating cold hands and feet for at least four months. (Thank goodness my hot flashes help to keep me warm.)

“A lot of people like snow. I find it to be an unnecessary freezing of water.” ~Carl Reiner

Many of my friends relish winter. They love skiing and ice skating. I never quite got the hang of it, either. Many years ago, I drove to Vermont with friends who were avid skiers. We decided to go cross-country skiing on a picturesque golf course in the majestic Green Mountains when we arrived. We had a quick lesson. When it was over, my friends took off across the hills as if they’d been doing it all their lives. Me? I skied down a tiny hill, panicked when I didn’t know how to stop, sat down, and took off my skis. When we met at the clubhouse, I was warm and toasty after several glasses of wine. I was their comic relief.

“A change in the weather is sufficient to recreate the world and ourselves.” ~Marcel Proust

Now that I’m in my fifties, my husband and I discuss the direction of our lives and where we see ourselves in five, ten, and twenty years. The first point of discussion is always the same - where do we want to live? Anyone that knows us has heard us talk, sometimes ad nauseum, about moving elsewhere. Every year we think it will be our last to survive another winter. But then our only child, our son, realized he is happiest living exactly where he is (and we’ve traveled to many places in and out of the country with him.) That fact alone has kept us solidly in the same place, and we’ve weaved our life around it.

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.” ~Albert Einstein

Plenty of “Best Places to Live” lists are compiled and splashed across premiere magazine headlines to catch our eye. Money Magazine listed Carmel in their Number One slot. No, not that Carmel – Carmel, Indiana – a quiet bedroom community that boasts “excellent schools, a big sports and recreation center, a performing arts center, and wide bike lanes.” But I don’t want to live in Indiana - they also have cold temperatures during winter. Business Week compiled its list of “America’s Best Cities to Live” and lists Los Angeles as Number 1. According to them, despite smog and traffic, Los Angeles has “iconic beaches, celebrity culture, and more than 8,000 restaurants to keep 3.8 million inhabitants occupied.” I’ve been to Los Angeles and love California, but Los Angeles is not for me. Then there’s Forbes Magazine. They published their “World’s 20 Best Places To Live,” and no city in the U.S. made their top 20. The closest in proximity is Toronto, Canada, or Vancouver, Canada. Their complete list named New York City as 100. That brings me right back to where I started.

“Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

In our Second Chapter, we have many decisions to choose our “best place to live.” Do we want to live near our children? As we age, it makes sense to live close to family. Do our parents need us? We are the “sandwich generation” and should take responsibility for caring for our aging parents. Do we want to begin anew finding friends? Leaving friends behind can be sad and difficult. I consider it a challenge, adding new friends to my roster of forever friends. Do we want to downsize by purchasing a condo rather than a house or rent first to see whether we like a new area? All of these questions require careful consideration.

The “Best Place to Live” is where you’ll be happiest according to your priorities. Only you know where that will be. Here’s our list of what we are looking for in our Second Chapter:

Warm weather.
Lower cost of living.
Access to culture (we were weaned on Manhattan’s finest theater, museums, restaurants, and music.)
A community of active people within our age group. We are not moving to retire but toward warmer weather, enabling us to live an active lifestyle all year round.
A nearby sports arena. This is negotiable since my husband is firmly embedded in being a San Francisco Giant fan and a University of Wisconsin everything fan.
Quality healthcare.
A strong job market offering great flexibility for career changers.

Perhaps we’re being a bit unrealistic, yet we’re determined to keep our eye on the prize in finding the best place for us. Our problem is that we’ve either visited or read about many places we’d like to try. Our cats are so lucky to have nine lives and nine different places to live.

“The tragedy of life is not so much what men suffer, but rather what they miss.” ~Thomas Carlyle

I’ll admittedly miss the change of seasons. I love each one in splendor, even the beauty of the first snowfall. A friend of mine living in Florida told me it took her a while to get used to having only two seasons. So I gathered a bunch of fallen leaves and mailed them to her. As for me, I’ve lived through the change of seasons for 53 years, and although I’ll miss them, I’m ready to take the next step in my life.

I’ll have to reconcile what my son will decide to do, whether he’ll stay here or move away with us. It will be difficult for me if he chooses to stay. I love him so dearly. But I’ll also celebrate his decision to begin the next step of his life, and, knowing him; he will celebrate ours. As for my parents, well, that’s another post.

What’s on your list of where you’d like to live during your Second Chapter? Can you visualize living where you are for the next 5, 10, or 20 years, or would you rather live elsewhere? Can you add anything to my list that I haven’t mentioned? I’d love to hear what you have to say!

Click on the REPLY button to leave a COMMENT. SUBSCRIBE to my blog by clicking on the SUBSCRIBE button (located on the top right-hand side of the page.) Check out past posts under “Recent Posts to Keep You Empowered.” Feel free to share my blog and pass it around. Enjoy!

DISCLAIMER: Comments from An Empowered Spirit are brought to your attention on topics that could benefit you and should be discussed with your doctor or other medical professional. I am not medically trained, and my posts are journalistic and not instead of medical advice. An Empowered Spirit and its author will not be held liable for any damages incurred from using this blog or any data or links provided.

Why I Write My Blog - Now This Is Empowering!

“Cathy, this post is just what I needed. I’m 47 and at a crossroads. I have struggled with bipolar disorder all of my adult life. I had to leave a career because I couldn’t function and have not worked since 1998. My B.A. is in journalism, and writing has always been my first love. I’ve wondered lately if age 47 is “too late” to accomplish anything meaningful in life. However, I have also been thinking I must stop worrying about chronological age and “just do it”! You’re a great writer and thinker, and I will follow you!”

I recently received this comment on my blog from someone I don’t know. It was heartfelt and honest. Here was someone who had taken the time to read my blog and then let me know what she’d been going through for a very long time. Honestly, that means everything to me.

I decided to start a blog to write about living life after age 50 and praying that other people would read and enjoy it. This latest comment was so meaningful to me because what I had to say registered with a complete stranger. That’s the power of the written word, and that’s why I love the art of writing. It can move and inspire people. Through our words, we have the ability to reach out to others and say, “Hey! I am here for you. I understand what you are going through because I am going through the same thing. Let’s do this together.”

I thought I’d let you all know how special your comments are to me…

Are Anti-Aging Products Empowering You?

“I have enjoyed greatly the second blooming... suddenly you find - at the age of 50, say - that a whole new life has opened before you” ~ Agatha Christie

We, the Baby Boomers of America, are constantly inundated with emails, tweets, and TV ads about the latest and greatest anti-aging products we simply must try. Last week alone, I was sent an email about bifocals that correct “computer and reading vision” (what’s computer vision?), a LinkedIn alert about a new anti-aging night cream “accidentally discovered” at a cancer research center, and a new diet to eliminate cellulite. When I searched “anti-aging” on Twitter, there were hundreds of tweets promoting absolute must-have anti-aging skincare programs, diet and exercise advice, and discoveries in supplements. Discover the Fountain of Youth! Cosmetic surgery will restore your youthful glow! Stay healthy looking with my new product! Start eating these anti-aging foods!

“Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.” ~Mark Twain

Now, I must admit, it’s tempting to try some of these products. After all, there are times when I look at myself in the mirror and ask where those fine lines come from and why are they showing up on my face. I’ve always been diligent about skincare by using gentle cleansers and moisturizers that stand by their “pure” ingredients. (Compared to 26-letter words of ingredients that sound like a foreign language.)

“There is a fountain of youth: it is your mind, your talents, the creativity you bring to your life and the lives of people you love. When you learn to tap this source, you will truly have defeated age.” ~ Sophia Lauren

As you know by now, I have always followed the advice of Dr. Andrew Weil. Here is his view on anti-aging products:

“The best ways to maintain skin health aren't very glamorous and certainly aren't overly costly: good nutrition, adequate water and essential fatty acids intake, and daily use of a good antioxidant multi-vitamin and mineral supplement. Beyond that, I recommend avoiding excessive use of soaps and skin irritants and protecting the skin from the sun, which causes cumulative damage that eventually shows up as wrinkles, age spots, or other discolorations. Another root cause of aging and deteriorating skin health is inflammation, which is often imperceptible. Still, it can result in such skin problems as sensitivity, puffiness, extreme dryness, hyperpigmentation, lines, and wrinkles.”

“It is a mistake to regard age as a downhill grade toward dissolution. The reverse is true. As one grows older, one climbs with surprising strides”. ~ George Sand

I admire Jennifer Siebel, a woman I’ve written about in a prior post (Empowering Our Children..and Ourselves). Her award-winning documentary Miss Representation champions equal rights for women by fighting sexism and challenging the media’s disparaging portrayal of women. One guest blogger on her MissRepresentation.org was Nicole Weider, a former model who founded Project Inspired and Me Without Makeup. She challenges young girls to love who they are and what they look like. She wants them to understand they don’t need tons of makeup to feel beautiful. She’s received hundreds of photos from girls who, according to her rules, wear no makeup and describe what they like best about themselves. It’s an EMPOWERing technique to illustrate her point. I wonder whether a website with this theme would work well with people aged 50+. Would we send a photo of ourselves wearing no makeup and list what we like most about ourselves? Hmm.

“The beauty of a woman is not in a facial mode but the true beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It is the caring that she lovingly gives the passion that she shows. The beauty of a woman grows with the passing years.” ~Audrey Hepburn

Good Housekeeping ran a test on anti-aging products and was awarded their “Top 22 Products That Really Work”. They say these products do more than hydrate your skin. They allegedly minimize lines on your face and lips and promise to make you look “better”. I have always been skeptical of these claims, mainly because I’ve used the gamut of lotions and serums from Oil of Olay to Origins to La Prairie. Ultimately, my pocketbook was lighter, and my skin looked the same. But it’s more than looking better – it’s also about feeling better.

We, the women of the Baby Boomer generation, have the opportunity to not only enjoy our Second Chapter but also to realize that the way we look on the outside is as beautiful as who we are on the inside. We must live our life according to our beliefs, yet we must also follow a path toward total confidence in our look and feel. Depending on what source you look at, the average life expectancy of a woman in 1900 was around 50 years old. Today it is approximately 80 years old (I have seen several charts that say 88 or older). What does that mean? It means we have more time than we used to work on ourselves (inside and out), time to work toward our dreams, time to make our bodies healthier, and, when we look in the mirror, time to say out loud that we’ve earned every wrinkle and fine line, and we are damn proud of it!

“With age come the inner, the higher life. Who would be forever young, to dwell always in externals?” ~Elizabeth Cady Stanton

I want to share an article on HealthCentral.com I thought was exciting and informative entitled, “Taking Care Of Your Skin Inside and Out.” It offers sage advice for all of us. In the meantime, let me know how you feel about anti-aging products and whether you agree or disagree with anything I've said. I’d love to hear from you – good, bad and everything. Thanks for reading my post!

Please hit REPLY and leave a COMMENT – let me know your thoughts! You may subscribe to my blog by clicking on the SUBSCRIBE button on the page's top right-hand side. Check out past posts under “Recent Posts to Keep You Empowered.” Please share my blog and pass it around. Enjoy!

Listen To Your Inner Voice To Empower Yourself

Frank McCourt published his first book, Angela’s Ashes, when he was 66. He received The Pulitzer Prize and The National Book Critics Circle Award the following year.

A few years ago, I wondered what I wanted to do with my life. Yes, I was nearing 50 and, like a woman in her 20s who’d recently graduated from college, I wondered what the future held for me. I never thought I’d be at the same crossroads I visited thirty years ago. But there I was, holding my yearning in one hand and my self-doubt in the other. What was a girl to do?

Depending on how you look at it, this time of your life can be exciting or unhappy. The power to feel the thrill and challenges awaiting you is within your control.

I was always envious of people who knew at an early age exactly what they wanted to do. I had floundered between jobs, from publishing to real estate to healthcare, always trying to find myself. I managed my work life as I thought I should, working nine-to-five jobs that, in the end, ended up being unfulfilling but earned a steady paycheck. Was this all there was?

Julia Child launched her first cooking show at the age of 51. F. Murray Abraham received his first good role and won an Academy Award in “Amadeus” at age 47.

Someone recently asked me, “What would your 20-year-old self say about making yourself happy?” Surprisingly I didn’t miss a beat. The answer was already on the tip of my tongue. “Write.”

There it was. I said it out loud. I suddenly felt a release of emotions I’d kept deep inside me for years. Why ignore that little voice that says precisely what we need to hear?

So I decided to rely on my writing ability and focused on issues that mattered to me most. Then I jumped full steam ahead and voraciously read everything I could get my hands on about how to create a blog, the use of social media in blogging, and how to reach a targeted audience. A month or two later, I was hired by a reputable health website where I could write articles and answer questions for my peers with Multiple Sclerosis (something near and dear to my heart).

At age 65, Colonel Sanders (Kentucky Fried Chicken) took his money from his Social Security check and began to open franchises. Less than ten years later, he sold the franchise to a corporation for 2 million dollars.

I am sticking with my dream of writing - shaping, molding, and making it my very own. I am committed to doing this as my life’s work and plan a daily schedule around it. It demands a deep respect for the written word (love) and a dedication and commitment to an audience (love). The downside is it can be very lonely sometimes (not crazy about it!). It has been rewarding beyond all measure as I meet others on this journey that are like-minded, generous of heart, and ready to offer constructive criticism and high praise.

Rodney Dangerfield was a last-minute replacement on The Ed Sullivan Show and became the surprise hit of the show. He was 46 years old.

I am a big fan of Don Miguel Ruiz, who wrote in his book “The Four Agreements” about being “impeccable with your word.”

“Your word is the power that you have to create…

Through your word, you express your creative power. It is through your word that you manifest everything…

What you dream, feel, and are, will all be manifested through the word.”

So what is your inner voice trying to tell you? Listen to it. We all have one. It’s been there all along to guide you. Perhaps we’ve been too caught up in our busy lives to take the time to listen to it. Open your heart and soul and listen to the truths of that voice. Follow your passions in your Second Chapter. Hey, you never know. Someday I may be writing about you!

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To Know Your Medications Is To Empower Yourself!

“Medicine sometimes snatches away health, sometimes gives it.” ~Ovid

For some time, my husband has experienced horrific back pain due to a herniated disc. An excruciating, unimaginable pain could turn the most formidable Olympic wrestler into a wailing crybaby. In the past, he’s turned to prescription medications that have dulled, yet not eliminated, the pain. He’s had physical therapy, and twice a day (when he feels better), he goes on our inversion table, trying to push the disc back into place.

Perhaps the most drastic solution he’s tried was the cortisone injections he received from his physician. A shot of cortisone (an anti-inflammatory medication) is given, along with a numbing medication, to provide temporary relief to the affected area. He’s received several courses of this treatment occasionally with some positive results.

But wait! Hold the phone! What’s this? The latest scare concerns the same cortisone injections he once received and the seven people who died from them. As of late Sunday, there were reports of 91 cases in 9 states of rare fungal meningitis, all linked to contaminated steroid injections. According to CNN.com, the patients contracted meningitis after being “injected in their spine with a preservative-free steroid called methylprednisolone acetate contaminated by a fungus. The steroid is used to treat pain and inflammation.”

“Stuff that's hidden and murky and ambiguous is scary because you don't know what it does.” ~Jerry Garcia

Is there anything that we can do, as patients and consumers, about having full disclosure on a medication or procedure we need to have? Are we at the mercy of the drug companies who manufacture these drugs and the compounding pharmacies who copy them? Do we need to choose between harming ourselves with drugs or living with pain without them? That reality both angers and scares me and renders a feeling of complete helplessness.

I am proud to be part of a great MS community of friends I have found on Facebook and Twitter. They are like-minded people who listen, support and advocate for each other. Our disability creates the need for a better quality of life, and we always reach out to help one another. Over the past 16 years, numerous FDA-approved MS drugs have been on the market. Yet we are still guinea pigs, suffering many challenging side effects over the years and sometimes even death. (See Tysabri and the controversial CCSVI). Sometimes the medication we take to make us well makes us sicker.

“Friends show their love in times of trouble.” ~Euripides

So what can we, the consumer, do to protect ourselves? How can we continue to advocate for better care from our doctors, better communication from drug companies, and better awareness of problems surrounding our medications? Here are some ways I’ve found to change the feeling of helplessness to being more in control of choosing what we put into our bodies:

1. Drugs@FDA: FDA US Food and Drug Administration site. Use this site to locate an FDA-approved medication. It lists the drug's name, its form (capsule, liquid), and possible side effects.

2. Daily Med: By the National Library of Medicine, this site provides “high-quality information about marketed drugs and information including FDA labels (package inserts).
3. CDC (Centers for Disease Control): You can check medications on the market. In this case, I checked the “Multistate Meningitis Outbreak Investigation” to read an update and summary on the current situation of the outbreak.

4. Pharmacy Compounding Accreditation Board: If you go to a compounding pharmacy, you may use this site to see whether it is accredited. According to the site, “While all pharmacies must meet licensure requirements, PCAB-accredited pharmacies have gone the extra mile to demonstrate that they comply with nationally accepted quality control, quality assurance, and quality improvement standards. This helps assure that the patient receives quality medication.”

5. Call your local State Health Department and/or clinic and hospital: If you are like us and have a question about a current problem with a medication, ask whether the issue is ongoing or if it is being resolved.

6. Peer Reviewed Journals: Once again, knowledge IS power. Take the time to read up on the medication you were prescribed. Peer-reviewed journals are the perfect place to start. According to The University of Texas (Austin) website: “Peer Review is a process that journals use to ensure the articles they publish represent the best scholarship currently available. When an article is submitted to a peer-reviewed journal, the editors send it out to other scholars in the same field (the author's peers) to get their opinion on the quality of the scholarship, its relevance to the field, its appropriateness for the journal, etc. Publications that don't use peer review (Time, Cosmo, Salon) rely on the editors' judgment of whether an article is up to snuff. That's why you can't count on them for solid, scientific scholarship.”

Regarding our health, we must do all we can to make the best choices for our loved ones and ourselves. I hope what I’ve offered you here has been helpful, and I encourage you to leave a comment to let me know your thoughts on all I’ve said. Let’s empower ourselves!

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Empower Yourself By Using Your Voice To Vote!

“Do you ever get the feeling that the only reason we have elections is to find out if the polls were right?” ~Robert Orben

Here it is, the week of the first Presidential debate – FINALLY! It seems like campaign season lasts forever – particularly since I only felt peaceful again after the Obama-McCain campaign! Is it me, or are these campaigns stretching out longer and longer and l-o-n-g-e-r? I know I shouldn’t complain since we live in the world's greatest country, where we can debate and discuss topical issues openly. The Universal Declaration of Human Rights, adopted in 1948, states, "Everyone has the right to freedom of opinion and expression; this right includes freedom to hold opinions without interference and to seek, receive and impart information and ideas through any media and regardless of frontiers." God bless the USA!

We have a lot at stake in every election. Being over the age of 50 means we need to know the issues, learn where each candidate stands, and use our voice by voting for the candidate we believe is the better choice.

“A man has a property in his opinions and the free communication of them.” ~James Madison

According to AARP, there are three questions you need to know where your candidates stand (Presidential, U.S. House of Representatives, and U.S. Senate). They are:

How would you protect Social Security for today’s seniors and strengthen it for future generations?
How would you put Medicare on the firmer financial ground and protect today’s seniors and future retirees from the burden of rising health costs?
How would you help Americans build a financial nest egg for their retirement?

With the upcoming election drawing near, it’s hard not to watch all political pundits argue their opinions about which candidate is better for our country and us. We get caught up in their spin seven days a week, ready to rely on what they have to say as the ultimate gospel. Be wary of relying on this! We’ve recently seen how busy the fact-checkers are, proving there were a lot of loose lips at the Democratic and Republican Conventions. So here are some tips to help you find the truth for the rest of the campaign season (Thanks once again to AARP):

Reuters correspondent Andy Sullivan has a debate watchers guide to help you see how the candidates may attack each other and what nonverbal cues may help or hinder them while debating.
Check the facts at reputable sites such as PolitiFact, FactCheckEd.org, and FactCheck.org.
Follow social media, such as Facebook (check Facebook Live page) and Twitter (for the debate, use #debate or #presidentialdebate) to learn what others say.
When I watch a debate or any important political event, I always watch C-SPAN. News anchors and special guests spin no annoying rhetoric. You can watch complete, uninterrupted programming. You can even upload the debate to your library if you watch it later.
YouTube, Yahoo, and AOL are partnering with the Presidential Debates to offer a forum for people to chat and discuss what they are watching. If you own an Xbox console, there’s an Xbox LIVE Election where you can watch a live feed of the debate and take part in polls and surveys.
AARP also offers Election 2012 Discussion live at AARP.com.

“Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact. Everything we see is a perspective, not the truth.” ~Marcus Aurelius

As Americans, particularly aged 50+ Americans, we need to use our strong voices for the issues that matter to us. We should decide what is best for our family, friends, country, and us. Take some time to learn the issues, read what your candidates say, speak your mind constructively by discussing your views, and go to the voting booth on November 6 to use your voice. It is your right, your duty, and your obligation.

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Being and Staying Authentic (Now That's Empowering!)

“The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are.” ~Carl Jung

This week, Jews worldwide celebrated the Jewish New Year, or Rosh Hashanah, a two-day celebration that begins on the first day of the first month of the Jewish calendar. While sitting in my synagogue, singing familiar prayer tunes, I reflected on the joys and sorrows of the past year. The Days of Awe (ten days of reflection between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur) always led me to question the purpose and meaning of my life and whether I feel satisfied with its direction.

"The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning." - Mitch Albom

During his sermon, the rabbi discussed the importance of staying true to your identity, always being authentic, and not straying from who you truly are. (I love my simple yet eloquent t-shirt that says, “Life is good. Remember where you came from.”) People or events may try to tempt you from being your true self. During those times, we must remember the values, convictions, and beliefs that ground us, the things that remind us of who we truly are.

“Have convictions. Be friendly. Stick to your beliefs as they stick to theirs.” ~Eleanor Roosevelt

It may seem as if teenagers' difficulties in staying true to themselves are limited. They are always bombarded with peer pressure in school, while radio, magazine, or TV ads capitalize on their need to fit in. (I used shimmering eye gloss so my eyes would look exactly like Cheryl Tiegs, and I drank Diet Pepsi to get that “girl watchers” look because “someone would be watching!” I read Seventeen magazines every chance I could to see what other teens were saying, wearing, and doing. Ugh.)

By our Second Chapter, we should be comfortable enough in our own skin to be true to ourselves. After all, we shouldn’t care about other people’s opinions at this stage of life. We are confident and worldly adults, right? Wrong! We are the infamous Baby Boomers, the ones advertisers are clamoring for to get our attention so we’ll purchase their product. (See the article in The Chicago Tribune about ads for Baby Boomers) Everything from wrinkle cream to eliminating cellulite to erectile dysfunction is all being marketed to catch our attention.

I look around, and within my circle of friends, I’ve seen couples purchasing second homes and/or sportier cars while some travel extensively. Some are sprucing themselves up to keep that young and natural look. Some retire early while enjoying their not-yet golden years by spending more time at their country club playing golf and eating dinner out five nights a week. Almost all of them talk about their new homes, vacations, or newfound radiance. Are they keeping up with the Joneses or simply rewarding themselves for many years of hard work? More importantly, are they being their authentic selves?

“I was going to have cosmetic surgery until I noticed that the doctor's office was full of portraits by Picasso.” ~Rita Rudner

We could become jealous. We could be angry, upset, or even depressed. Do we always want what the other guy has? Do we always want something different than what we have today? Are we staying true to our authentic selves by buying newer and more extravagant products?

The dictionary defines authentic as “not false or copied; genuine; real,” and I add another word – true.

“This above all:
To thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.” ~Hamlet, William Shakespeare

There is nothing wrong with wanting to have nice things in our life for the right reasons. Everyone would like to live a comfortable life and have nice things. Unfortunately, I’ve spent too many lunches listening to others brag about their latest and greatest purchase as if it makes them superior human beings. Like my Dad used to say, “We all put our pants on one leg at a time.”

I FEEL AT EASE when I am around someone who is his or her authentic self. They seem to sparkle and shine in their authenticity. They dance to their own tune and live according to their own rules, never worrying about someone else’s standards. They revel in the knowledge that what they do and how they live is exactly where they want to be.

“What you are is what you have been. What you'll be is what you do now.” ~Buddha

Here is my list of what keeps me true to myself. What’s on your list?

1. Tune out naysayers. People are always willing to let you know their opinion of what you do, say, or think. Tune them out and let your true self shine through. In my Second Chapter, I’m working on creating my life according to my passions: writing and being a health advocate. Although I have a disability that hinders me from doing all I’d like, I focus on what I can do and use my abilities in my work. I don’t “look sick,” so people often wonder (out loud), “Why doesn’t she have a real job working nine to five?” or “If she’s so sick, why isn’t she in bed more often?” I tune them out and continue to write and advocate.

“We need to find the courage to say NO to the things and people that are not serving us if we want to rediscover ourselves and live our lives with authenticity.” ~Barbara DeAngelis

2. Finding Your Moral Compass. It’s essential to remain grounded in life by your values and beliefs. Those values will guide you throughout life by being your moral compass when facing challenging situations. I recently read the book “Happiness: How to Find it and Keep It” by Joan Duncan Oliver. I love what she said about living your truth:

“Your values tell your life story. What you do, say, think, and pray to speaks volumes about the principles that guide you. Where is true north on your moral compass? Whatever challenges you face, following your conscience can help you stay on the road to happiness. In the long run, it’s character that counts.” ~Joan Duncan Oliver

3. Journaling. I’ve said it before, and I’ll repeat it. Take a piece of paper and write down your innermost thoughts, desires, and goals. Make a list of what keeps you grounded (friends, religion, etc.) and how you can remain true to yourself. What obstacles get in your way? How can you avoid those obstacles? What relationships are harmful and toxic? What can you do to eliminate the negativity? Once you’re finished, look over your list. Refer to it when facing a challenging situation. It will keep you grounded and authentic.

“Journal writing is a voyage to the interior.” ~Christina Baldwin

4. Love Yourself. It sounds arrogant. But it’s the truth! You have to love the person you are right at this moment. You are your biggest asset, your best cheerleader, and the one who knows the beauty within you. Accept yourself unconditionally and love that person. Made a mistake? Love yourself anyway. Feel badly about the way you spoke to your spouse? Love yourself anyway. Yelled loudly at your children because you’re in a bad mood? Love yourself anyway. Those closest to you love you unconditionally. You should accept and love yourself unconditionally as well!

“Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.” ~Lucille Ball

5. Accept the past and forgive those who hurt you. Holding onto anger from hurtful situations that happened long ago is a waste of time. You won’t change anything by holding onto the anger – you will only hurt yourself. We’ve all been hurt at one time or another. Parents, siblings, friends, and teachers have all been the source of past hurts. It’s time to move on and focus on the here and now.

“Make a pact with yourself today to not be defined by your past. Sometimes the greatest thing to come out of all your hard work isn't what you get for it, but what you become for it..” ~Steve Maraboli, Author of Life, the Truth and Being Free

I can think of no one better to end my post than the beloved Dr. Seuss. He said, “Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”

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DISCLAIMER: Comments from An Empowered Spirit are brought to your attention on topics that could benefit you and should be discussed with your doctor or other medical professional. I am not medically trained, and my posts are journalistic and not in place of medical advice. An Empowered Spirit and its author will not be held liable for any damages incurred from using this blog or any data or links provided.

Remembering September 11

On a clear, crisp morning eleven years ago today, I waved goodbye to my son as his school bus pulled away. He looked out the window and waved his little hand at me in a gesture of "See you later, Mom." As I walked back home on my street, I talked with neighbors and discussed the beauty of the day and what was new in our lives. Suddenly a neighbor came running out of her house shouting, "The Tower has been hit! The Tower has been hit!"

Americans' lives have never been the same, and our innocence was gone forever.

Each September 11 at 8:46 AM, our heart skips a beat as we remember. We remember the lives lost, the families changed forever and a nation gripped in anger, shock, and grief.

We salute every brave hero - every policeman, firefighter, and volunteer - who bravely gave of themselves, some losing their lives, to help others that day.

As a New Jerseyan, a state that lost many of its citizens - neighbors, friends, and family - I thank Mayor Giuliani for holding us together that day and in the days that followed.

My prayers and thoughts are with those we lost that day and all their families and friends. We are with you and will never, ever forget you.

Empowering Yourself With The Food You Eat

“There is no sincerer love than the love of food” ~George Bernard Shaw

I’ve always had a love-hate relationship with food. Growing up, it was a love of all varieties of cheese, chocolate, and pasta. In college, I loved pizza, grinders (Boston’s equivalent of a NY submarine sandwich), and (as any good Boston College grad knows) beer! I love every ethnic cuisine available and am always eager to try something new.

Have you heard of the freshman 15? I returned home after freshman year with the freshman 30! Do Not Pass Go. Do Not Collect $100. Go DIRECTLY to Weight Watchers!

Today there is a proliferation of food choices. Fifteen years ago, there were one or two Japanese sushi restaurants in our area, and I felt uncomfortable eating raw fish (that has since changed). Grocery stores did not have sections for organic and “natural” food. Wonder (white) bread was the bread of choice – housewives believed their slogan, “Wonder Bread Helps Builds Strong Bodies 12 Ways.” At home, we ate either lemon sole or salmon once a week for dinner; there was not a wide variety of fish offered locally. We never saw kale, swiss chard, arugula, or broccoli rabe offered in the vegetable aisle.

Local ethnic restaurants were mainly Italian (think heavy sauces like Fettuccine Alfredo) and Chinese (with the always popular Chop Suey) food. We ate full-fat, high-cholesterol, and high-sodium meals. (One more example: When I was in college, my father sent me a L-O-N-G salami from his favorite German deli. I was to tie a string on its top and hang it up to allow the “extra fat” to drip off. (Imagine my roommate’s horror!) Since my dad is German, this was typical fare. I can almost feel my arteries hardening just thinking about eating that salami!

Now that I’m in my fifties, I’ve learned to make smarter food choices for better health. Given the wider variety now available, I try to eat fewer calories/salt/fat/carbs and increase my daily intake of fresh fruits and vegetables. If organic food is available, I believe it’s wise to purchase it despite the higher price. (Read the Mayo Clinic article about organic vs. non-organic food to decide on buying organic food.) I rarely eat red meat (Read the CNN.com article about eating red meat) and mainly eat chicken (white meat/skinless), pork, and turkey. I use Trader Joe’s soy creamer for my morning cup of Joe and have nonfat, regular, or vanilla yogurt while adding fresh fruit and slivered almonds.

“When you go to the grocery store, you find that the cheapest calories are the ones that are going to make you the fattest” ~Michael Pollan, Author of Food Inc.: A Participant Guide: How Industrial Food is Making Us Sicker, Fatter, and Poorer-And What You Can Do About It

I’ve removed white sugar and white flour from my diet and stick to whole grains, like quinoa and wild or brown rice.

I drink 64 ounces of filtered water daily (It’s good for you and may prevent me from passing another kidney stone - ouch!) I drink lots of green tea. Green tea has antioxidant properties. There is evidence it may protect against certain cancers and reduce your risk of heart disease.

“Food for the body is not enough. There must be food for the soul.” ~Dorothy Day

I love good food and the social aspect of savoring the meal, as the Europeans do, with family, friends, and good conversation. I’d lie if I said I never have cheese, chocolate, or pizza. Once in a while, I still grab a beer simply because I want one. (Last week, while in San Diego, I tasted a delicious new beer – Coronado Orange Wit – yum!) But these days, when I have something less healthy, I eat smaller portions and am mindful of each bite (Read the NY Times article about mindful eating.) This allows me to control what I eat and stops me from mindlessly putting food and drink in my mouth while I busily multitask doing work.

“Health food may be good for the conscience but Oreos taste a hell of a lot better.” ~Robert Redford

Will changing our diet help us to live longer? I can’t say. I will say that we all have something in our life we have no control over. What we put into our mouths is something we all have control over. Hopefully, in the end, what we are eating will give us a better quality of life.

Healthy food doesn’t have to taste bad. In fact, these days, the food I eat is purer, fresher, and more flavorful than ever. So why the “hate” part of the love/hate relationship? Perhaps because I can’t eat whatever I want to without worrying about gaining weight or raising my cholesterol levels. But then again, I also can’t do a cartwheel or stay up late without feeling tired the next day.

“Growing up is losing some illusions in order to acquire others.” ~Virginia Woolf

In our Second Chapter, we have the knowledge and ability to erase the “hate” portion of our relationship with food by having more control over our food choices. Being more aware of our foods adds greater pleasure to our eating experience. Plus, it simply allows us to feel and look better. Once again, being over 50 ain’t so bad!

I’d enjoy hearing about your food stories and your “way of life” eating habits. Do you eat organic or do you think it’s a bunch of ridiculous rhetoric? Are you a vegan or vegetarian, and if so, why did you choose to become one? Do you eat the same as you always have and think limiting your food choices is silly? Please leave a comment and share your thoughts.

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Please subscribe to my blog by clicking on the SUBSCRIBE button. Check out “Recent Posts to Keep You Empowered”, and browse through past comments under “Comments to Enrich Us”. Share my blog and pass it around… Enjoy!

DISCLAIMER: Comments from An Empowered Spirit are brought to your attention on topics that could benefit you and should be discussed with your doctor or other medical professional. I am not medically trained, and my posts are of a journalistic nature and not in lieu of medical advice. An Empowered Spirit and its author will not be held liable for any damages incurred from using this blog or any data or links provided.