Comments on: Why You Should Never Make Snap Judgements

By: Gilly Maddison

Gilly Maddison — Fri, 12 Aug 2016 14:18:41 +0000

Thank you, but... Oh. My. Goodness. Red face - can't believe I put their instead of there in my comment. Forgive me for bringing bad grammar to your blog! :-) (It's not catching though!)

By: shifrachester@gmail.com

shifrachester@gmail.com — Fri, 12 Aug 2016 12:06:24 +0000

You said it brilliantly and I agree with you wholeheartedly, Gilly. Kindness can be misinterpreted by those who don't have it and can't seem to acquire it. But that shouldn't stop us from holding it in our hearts and doling it out in buckets, eh? Thanks for sharing your wonderful thoughts, my friend.

By: Gilly Maddison

Gilly Maddison — Thu, 11 Aug 2016 04:08:48 +0000

It's lovely to see someone writing about this. I have believed in this ethos since I was a child. However, It has, at times, caused problems with people who are suspicious of kindness, believing their has to be a hidden negative or, who are so badly damaged, they cannot accept your acceptance of them.

If a person's self-hatred is very deep, they will despise you for showing kindness to them and be suspicious of you. They can even become abusive because your kindness to them is way outside their comfort zone. As I have got older and learned from this, I am fully aware that we have to be realistic when being kind to people who are not used to it and sometimes that means the kindness has to be anonymous for our own protection.

Not sure if I explained that very well! I guess what I am saying is, I have learned that not everyone can deal with kindness, no matter how subtly expressed and we have to be aware of own own safety. It is often very hard for people who are used to being judged negatively to deal with kindness and they don't always get it. That said, I would never let it stop me - I am just very careful about how I do it.

This is a brilliant post - the world needs more of this attitude.

By: Cathy Lawdanski

Cathy Lawdanski — Tue, 09 Aug 2016 20:21:01 +0000

"People aren't wrong because they disagree with you. They simply see the world with a different lens." Oh that I would remember this! Powerful reminder, Cathy. Thanks so much for writing this beautiful piece!

By: Lois Alter Mark

Lois Alter Mark — Tue, 09 Aug 2016 19:59:44 +0000

So true. Michael and I have discussed many times the snap judgements we've made that turned out to be completely wrong. And, you're right - I probably wouldn't have picked up that copy of Catcher in the Rye, which is probably my favorite book ever!

By: 1010ParkPlace

1010ParkPlace — Tue, 09 Aug 2016 17:41:48 +0000

Curiosity, tolerance and compassion... with probably a little role reversal thrown in. Thank you for reminding us to look beyond our covers. xoxox, Brenda

By: maggie macmillan

maggie macmillan — Tue, 09 Aug 2016 17:25:06 +0000

Loved it and spot on, as usual!

By: Sue

Sue — Tue, 09 Aug 2016 17:16:56 +0000

I think we are all guilty of making snap judgements Cathy and I was only reflecting on this a few days ago. I've seen the books covers in brown paper in the bookstores in Australia and thinking it is a great idea.

By: Ruth

Ruth — Tue, 09 Aug 2016 16:27:54 +0000

I also think we can be put in situations where making assumptions about people is just part of the process. Bucking that temptation to go with the first, physical impression is tough but can be very rewarding. I appreciate your example of asking yourself how the homeless person found himself on the streets or why that person disagrees with you. I am so with you Cathy! We miss out on the richness of life and finding out amazing things about people when don't stop to wonder, ask, question.

Love your perspective!

By: Barbara Torris

Barbara Torris — Tue, 09 Aug 2016 14:32:20 +0000

I read a book several years ago called "Blindness" by Jose Saramago that made you wonder what life would be like if we all were truly blind. Our judgements and quality of life would change in ways we could never imagine.

I like "People aren’t wrong because they disagree with you. They simply see the world through a different lens; their experiences and circumstances are different than yours." If we could only remember to simply disagree and not to judge.

Beautiful post Cathy. Loved it!

By: Nita

Nita — Tue, 09 Aug 2016 12:43:51 +0000

Great post and a good reminder 🙂

By: Haralee

Haralee — Tue, 09 Aug 2016 12:29:41 +0000

Great reminder Cathy! Recently when I was missing my next to front tooth I was the recipient of judging a book by it's cover. Told the bathroom key at Starbucks was for customers only and being escorted to a section in a store! The missing tooth cover me was suspect to be homeless, meth addict or poor and treated differently than the full tooth smile cover me!