I recently read a discussion on Facebook asking if we had stay-at-home or working moms when we grew up. It dawned on me that mine was both.
My mother went back to night school when I was 5 to finish her college education, and was home during the day to raise my brothers and me.
She finally earned her degree when I was 10 and immediately found a job as a second grade teacher.
So I was the product of a stay-at-home and a working mom. Now that I'm a mother I realize how hard and tiring it must have been for my mom, yet she always managed to be available to help me with my homework and drive me to school activities.
If you asked me what was the "best" thing she did for me I couldn't point to one specific thing because there were so many ways she illustrated how to have courage despite adversity.
She'd be the last person to acknowledge this, so I decided to write her a letter to show how I learned the meaning of courage from the life she's lived.
Dear Mom,
Mother’s Day is coming and I haven’t a clue what to get for you. You always say you don’t need anything. Despite what you say, I wish I won the lottery so I could bring you back to Paris or spend a week together at a spa.
For now you’ll have to settle on what I can offer you: my words. To others this may sound trivial, but I know that’s not how you’ll feel. You’ve always been my biggest fan since the day I was born, and today will be no exception.
You’ve spent all of your life somewhat in the shadows of others. You grew up at a time when being a feminist was not fashionable and men held all the power, both at home and in the office.
Despite that, Mom, you stepped out on your own. Only you never realized that’s what you were doing, and never gave yourself credit for it.
Well, Mom, I’m here to point it out to you and to anyone reading this post. So brace yourself.
You excelled in school, making valedictorian while working from a young age to help with your family’s finances. As a young newlywed and mother you held your family together after a family tragedy, taking care of my grandparents and my brother under the same roof while dad went off to war.
This was no easy task but you did what you had to do.
You quit college to earn a living for you and dad, a selfless act. After dad became a successful attorney it was your turn to do something for yourself.
You decided to go back to school to finish your college degree even though you had three young children at home.
You were a product of your generation: a stay-at-home mom whose main function was to cook, clean and take care of the kids. That wasn’t enough for you.
You were revolutionary by going back to work while your children were young. In those days few mothers were working full-time.
I was so proud of you.
Although you were busy as a teacher you always had time to help me with my math homework or listen to my silly schoolgirl stories. You were always available to me, and I thank you for that.
When I was first diagnosed with MS you kicked into gear and took great care of me. After I was married and wanted to become pregnant, you drove hours with me to hear a lecture by a doctor who specialized in MS and pregnancy.
And when I miscarried for the second time, you were alone with me in Tanglewood. You consoled my aching heart.
When Jordan was born it was no surprise that you and Dad spent hours at the hospital needing to be nearby to make sure the baby and I were healthy. Gary and I were happy to have you join us in the delivery room after our healthy son was born.
So, Mom, you’re quite a special lady. I wanted to remind you of that, and of how much you’ve mattered to me. Most importantly, I want to publicly say, “I love you.”
Happy Mother’s Day, Mom.
This post originally appeared on An Empowered Spirit for Mother's Day 2013.
Your mother sounds amazing. Now I know where you get it!
Cathy, what a beautiful tribute to your Mom. It made me tear up.
Cathy, what a beautiful tribute to your mom.I can tell you are both very special ladies.
Beautiful, Cathy! You look a lot like your mum, and I'm not at all surprised that your post moved her to tears. She sounds like a great lady, and you're such a kind, loving daughter. She should be proud.
Okay, it's a good thing I had the tissue box handy for this one. Beautiful tribute from one amazing woman to another -- the apple apparently doesn't fall far from the tree. You are so lucky to have each other -- and I thank your mom for having you! xo
Just beautiful through the tears. What a wonderful tribute. Happy Mother's Day Mrs. New!
Hooray for your mother's support at all times, but especially with your high-risk pregnancy. Hooray for Jordan's arrival!
This is a beautiful tribute. Your mom sounds like an amazing woman.
Cathy, this is so very sweet. Your mom sounds like an incredible woman and a wonderful mother to you. I am so glad you have written about her so I now know something about and more about you! Happy Mother's Day.
Cathy,
A very nice tribute to your Mom!
She is a dedicated, warm and loving person who I'm sure touches anyone she comes in contact with.
Your mom sounds both compassionate and strong - like you!
What a great tribute to your mom!
I love this, Cathy. What a tribute to your mom -- and what an amazing woman. No wonder we're so much alike. I think our moms are, too. 🙂
Cathy: Such a beautiful post. No wonder we are so much alike... so are our mothers. 🙂
What a fabulous mom - a strong, courageous role model - you have Cathy.
Love the pics. Love the sentiment. And I always love a strong, smart woman. Amazing what they can do. Hats off to your wonderful Momma! I hope you two get to go on that trip to Paris someday. Even the spa day sounds fabulous. 🙂
Well, of course, my face is raining.
What a lovely letter to your mom, Cathy, she sounds like a truly amazing woman.
But she couldn't help but be, because she raised such an amazing daughter.
Cathy, you know how I feel about you. You are my inspiration, and now your mom is, too. What a beautiful tribute. Good thing I had Kleenex with me!
Oh Cathy, this sounds so much like me and my mom. We were so blessed to be raised by such extraordinary women! Happy Mother's Day to both of you.
What a wonderful mom you have! I loved reading how much you appreciate the things she's done and I'm sure she will, too...though, I think I would send along some tissue because the tears are sure to fall.
So, here I was... just hanging out, having a Diet Coke, and then BAM!, I'm crying my eyes out. OMG... this was great. Just great! Your mother must be very proud of you. Very. Proud.
Such a lovely tribute to your mom. You are truly blessed to have her. Happy Mother's Day!
No wonder you are proud of her. What a fantastic woman. These heartfelt words from you surely mean more to her than anything money could buy. You both are quite lucky to have one another. Happy Mother's Day to you and her!
What a wonderful tribute to your fabulous mom. I'm with you: there just isn't enough money in the world to give our mothers the gifts they deserve. But in reality, a heartfelt message like this, is worth millions.
What a beautiful tribute, Cathy!
Best wishes to you and your mother on this Mother's Day - you are so lucky to have each other.
Your mother must be so proud of you. What a beautiful tribute, she did a great job raising you - your spirit is so strong and so evident, Cathy!
A special tribute from a special lady to a special mom! I envy you that you had your mom in your life for so many years. I was a teen when my mom died and I am trying to be that special mom to my daughter, my best friend. Thank you for that emotional post - it touched me deeply.
Carol @ Battered Hope
You and your mother have a special relationship, so full of love and friendship!
Cathy,
What a lovely homage to your fantastic mom. It's so true that our moms are/were products of their times as are we. Love that she was the class valedictorian. Hope she is enjoying your wise and loving words.
I love this post and I love your mom and you know I love you! We need a mother/daughter double date! Happy Mother's Day to both of you beautiful women!
Cathy, the woman you are today is a reflection of what a wonderful parent your mom was/is. I know our lives have been different, but we have both been blessed with our family. Happy Mother's Day to you and your Mom.
Of course your mom is a special woman -- look at the daughter she has! Lovely tribute, Cathy. Happy Mother's Day to you and your mom.
My dear " other daughter" ,
The lives of Moms and daughters take many paths and it is often not until we look back that we appreciate the road well traveled. Each generation of women has it's own contribution and for your Mom and me, it certainly was family first and then whatever work fit our talents. And there is no greater reward than being blessed with the wonderful daughters we have. So, happy Mother's Day to you and thank you for sharing that very special tribute to your Mom. It made my heart happy!
Such a beautiful tribute to your lovely mom - thank you so much for sharing, Cathy!
Oh Cathy how I loved this! And that photo of the two of you is really beautiful. I can see where you get your pretty smile. 🙂 I had so much trouble finding a photo of my mom and me for my Huff Post piece because my mom always hated to have her picture taken! Your mom sounds like she is a strong woman and wonderful role model and clearly many of her wonderful traits have been passed down to you. Happy Mother's Day!
What a lovely way to express "I love you" to your Mom on Mothers Day! Hugs and love to you and her....and please thank her for the yummy grilled cheese sandwiches that she made us for lunch in elementary school. 🙂
What a gorgeous tribute to your mom!!! I love how she has always been your biggest fan and helped you achieve all that you wanted to.
My mother did both eventually, to. They taught us to find balance and to value both parts of themselves and ourselves. We are very fortunate women!
You are so lucky to still have your mom, and she is so lucky to have a lovely daughter like you!
Oh Cathy, What a beautiful and heartfelt post! Your mom sounds wonderful and I can see how she's shaped you. xoxo
I loved reading this again, Cathy. What a beautiful tribute to an extraordinary mom. Happy Mother's Day to both of you wonderful women!
Not to copy everybody but your mother sounds incredible and raised one hell of an incredible daughter. I see where you get your charm, your kindness and your strength.
Beautiful. Just beautiful. What a lovely reflection.
What a beautiful tribute to your wonderful mom. I love the old pictures of your family too. What wonderful smiles.
The apple didn't fall from the tree.
You and your mother are so lovely, inside and out. beautiful post! Happy Mother's Day to both of you!
Super sweet article about your mom and the adversity you both have tackled. We are stronger when we lean on others. So glad you had an awesome mom because she helped make you awesome!
Hugs,
Teresa
So beautiful. Hugs to you and your mom. You look just like her!!!
Beautiful post Cathy, she sounds like a wonderful mother!
The apple never falls far from the tree, Cathy. It's always a wonderful thing when we let our moms know how much they mean to us. I'm very happy for you that you had such a wonderful and loving mother ... and she such a wonderful and loving daughter!
Beautiful post about your mom - and about yourself, too. I related to it. As we're growing up, we're clueless most times about what we learn from our moms. It's not until we're HER, at that age, that we realize how lucky we are/were.
Such a beautiful tribute!
How did I miss this? Brought tears to my eyes. It is so sweet and so heartfelt, I just want to hug you both!!
What a wonderful tribute to a wonderful mom.
Lovely and heartfelt. You clearly take after your mama, Cathy. She's surely so proud of you as well. Sweet stuff here!
Your mom must be walking on air to have such a terrific daughter!