I received some challenging news from my neurologist, but I wasn't surprised. I've lived with Multiple Sclerosis for almost four decades, so I learned to expect the unexpected. Interestingly, after the doctor's appointment, a quote started to repeat in my head:

"God only gives us what we can handle." 

Given historical and recent events, I'm not convinced that no one faces more than they can handle. For now, I'll focus on the following mantra instead:

I envy people who seem to have smoother lives and don't have to worry about physical limitations, accessibility, or health issues that hinder simple pleasures. It's quite a blessing.

But millions of people face the challenges of illness and adversity in one way or another. Our special needs can create anxiety and sadness because life can be tough and frustrating. This isn't the life we imagined.

I searched for a quote that might give us some solace. The Buddha never disappoints:

"Let us rise up and be thankful, for if we didn’t learn a lot today, at least we learned a little, and if we didn’t learn a little, at least we didn’t get sick, and if we got sick, at least we didn’t die; so, let us all be thankful." ~Buddha  

I guess it's time to tell you what I learned at my recent appointment with my neurologist, the catalyst for this post.

In recent years, I've been experiencing more MS symptoms. I frequently lose my balance while walking, and my right leg feels numb, weak, and heavy. I struggle with embarrassing bladder issues, and walking has become more challenging.

This has been a major concern as someone who loves spending time in nature.

I had no new lesions on my last MRI (pretty much the goal with MS), but I also had no remission (or return to normal) of the symptoms I was experiencing. In other words, new symptoms don't disappear; they're here to stay.

After 38 years of living with relapsing-remitting MS (the most common type of MS), I now have what's called secondary progressive MS.

I was almost expecting this news.

I'll never allow a few words established by the medical community to define me.

A new "type" of MS won't change who I am. It's a label, a few words strung together to categorize our disease. As a friend recently said, "We're not beat yet!" You betcha.

Let's face it: not every day is our best. Sometimes, we feel sad or discouraged. There are days when we struggle to get out of bed, get angry at our MS, or reluctantly cancel plans because we can't keep up with the pace of others.

This is normal and human; it's impossible to maintain a positive or resilient attitude every single day.

I learned that instead of quashing negative emotions, we have to experience them fully. That's what "experts" say. (Listen to Melli O'Brien talk about regulating negative emotions. I subscribe to her newsletter and find her wisdom comforting.)

Negative emotions are inevitable; we must confront them if we want to return to the light.

How I focus on the positive while living with the unpredictability of MS

It's crucial to learn how to navigate life's challenges effectively. There are numerous ways to achieve this. Here's my approach. What do you do?

1. Do what you love.  Some ideas include playing a sport, spending more time with your children, joining a gym, writing or knitting, or picking up a new hobby or one you've put aside.  Refocusing your attention can revitalize and refresh your mind, body, and spirit.
2. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. Replacing negative thoughts with positive ones is invaluable.  "Cognitive-behavioral therapy is based on the idea that our thoughts cause our feelings and behaviors, not external things, like people, situations, and events.  The benefit of this fact is that we can change the way we think to feel / act better even if the situation does not change." ~National Association of Cognitive Behavioral Therapists  
3. Count Your Blessings. It's important to recognize and appreciate the good things in your life. These can include your loved ones, your achievements at work, and other positive aspects. Take the time to focus on these blessings and express your gratitude to those who have been a part of them. You may be surprised at how much joy they bring you!
4. Take time for yourself. Take a bubble bath and light some candles for a relaxing staycation.  Get a hot stone massage.  Take a walk in the park to surround yourself with the beauty of nature.  Watch an old movie that makes you laugh.  Do something that feels good and rejuvenates you.  You deserve it.
5. Set daily goals for yourself. Use the ease of a program like Google Calendar to schedule personal tasks that make you happy. These personal goals will help you feel good and are important for your well-being.
6. Don't let a bad day get you down. Remind yourself of your successes and those who love and support you unconditionally. Life is filled with ups and downs. How you handle them is what's important. You're a badass! You're a survivor! You—and we—can do this! We can do hard things together.
7. Check my MS RESOURCES page for more information about MS and possible programs that may interest you.

The miracle of everyday blessings

My wise cousin once said that any test we face is a sign that something wonderful is about to happen.

Her advice aligns with the quote that's been on my mind. The strength we need to endure lies within us. We must believe in the miracle of everyday blessings because we've been given the power to change how we think and feel in any situation. We can do this, I promise you.

I've learned to live within my abilities and adapt as best as possible. I don't want to dwell on the past; I want to live for today, right now in this moment. I'm grateful that I can continue to have that choice!

How do you stay positive when life becomes challenging? Will you follow any of my suggestions to live a positive life? Do you have any other suggestions? Please let me know in the comment section below.